It is FINALLY done!!! Ok, well the rough draft is done at least lol :-P

I finished the rough draft of my grad school essay about 15 minutes ago.

I like it.

I really do.

The only problem I have with it, is that I wish it could be longer. It is already about 1/2 to 3/4 of a page longer than it should be. When I sat down to write it I thought that I wouldnt have anythign to write about. But once I started typing it was really hard to stop. I honestly could have written 10 pages. Condensing 10 pages down to 1-2 pages was unbelievably hard. I realized just how much thought I had given to my future education/career goals, and I wanted an opportunity to explain it. I also wanted to tell them about all the things I'm good at, like presenting, and my inorganic take home tests lol, and writting lab reports, and doing organizational things, etc. I felt like if I could just write more, then they would really be able to understand why I want to go to grad school, and they would totally pick me. Oh well.

I am having Dr. Randall proof read it tomorrow. Once he gives me the thumbs up on it, I am going to sit down one night and fill out ALL my applications. It is going to be sooooo scary to push the send button. I know I wont get into all or even most of the schools I am applying to (regardless of how supportive my friends are, and regardless of how well they think I will do, I honestly wont get into some of them). It is really scary to send an application, knowing you will be getting a rejection letter in the mail. It's like asking out the popular guy who talks to you and who sometimes flirts with you...you know you are going to get turned down, but you will just kick the shit out of yourself if you dont ask and you end up going to your ten year high school reunion just to find out that he had a huge crush on you the whole time but he was just too chicken to ask you out first. And yes, I am aware that sentence was super long and rambly lol. I just dont want to sit around five years from now wondering...could I have gotten into UCSB?

Anyway, I think I am going to post my essay up here once Dr. Randall ok's it. I'm kind of embarrrassed about doing that, but I would honestly like to know what you guys think before I send it out you know?

Well, I am super tired, and it is super late. Ugh. Well, keep your fingers crossed that Randall likes my essay :-/